Verse 1
I’ve conquered Dustbowl and Badwater too,
From the gray skies of Sawmill to the blue of Hoodoo.
I’ve fought so many battles for RED and for BLU,
But there’s still just one thing that I’ve yet to do.

I’ve been playing this game for so many years,
And there’s only one thing that I have to fear.
The feeling of never knowing what it is like,
To cover my head in some bright, shiny lights.

Chorus
Wish I had an unusual, so I could hold my head high,
The medics would stop instead of walk right on by.
An unusual, would answer all of my prayers,
And the free to plays would all stand in the spawn and stare.

Verse 2
My friends enjoy giving me a really hard time.
They say my hat’s too dull and ask why it doesn’t shine.
I often have dreamt of what it’d be like,
To receive compliments like them after a fight.

To be feared and respected is all I really ask,
And to have a Medic’s beam shoved right up my ass.
Then I could thank Gaben for fulfilling my wish,
Of destroying all those who are poor and Irish.

Chorus
Wish I had an unusual, so I could hold my head high,
The medics would stop instead of walk right on by.
An unusual, would answer all of my prayers,
And the free to plays would all stand in the spawn and stare.

Chorus
Now I have an unusual, and nothing’s really changed
When my friends and I talk, they still treat me just the same
An unusual, didn’t really change a thing.
Except my head is glowing brighter and my wallet’s feeling lighter ‘cause I spent my money on a video game hat.